DUNGEON LOG: KEYSTONE REEF

[phantasmods]

Expedition day dawns, as usual, with an android mass text -

Okay, so, this time we're aiming to go out and stabilize the Fissure in the reef you can see up a little to the north of here. The waters are usually pretty calm this time of year, so if you can swim instead of needing to take a boat, that'd be a great help. We only have a few of them.

Also, I know that last time was a mess, so I'm just gonna say this: If you need to get out for any reason, just send us a message and a picture of your location. We'll get a drone out to you as soon as we can and bring you home. No questions asked.

( ﾟ▽ﾟ)/ Stay safe out there! When you're ready to go, meet us down at the beach. The rocky, sparkly one, not the sandy one.

Unlike previous expeditions, this time there's no rooftop sendoff - instead, as Charm noted, the tables are set up on Glitterstone beach, along with a series of boats pulled up on the sand. Two rowboats that could maybe sit six people but probably better suited for four, a trio of inflatable rafts (with motors attached to the back, all mismatched) of about the same size, a two-person dinghy and a long canoe that could hold two or three.

Besides the little fleet, there's also the usual bagged lunches (in gallon ziplocs this time, and other such watertight containers), and every boat is equipped with a large number of those chepa dollar-store water bottles, all with their airtight store seals. There's also a selection of life vests and other floatation thingies in a box next to the table. Strange hovers over the setup, checking watertightness of a handful of first aid kits with a spritzer and a bucket to submerge things in. They give a little wave to anyone passing by headed to the boats.

For those who opt instead to swim, everything seems perfectly normal until you reach the border of the Fissure... When, very suddenly, it isn't.

Comments

[founderinglight]

I can and I will, because you have the unfair advantage of a cooperative nervous system! Or whatever your equivalent is.

[myocordial]

Yes, well, it's not easy controlling this tail. There's too much of it. And I still hit you.

...I think that means you just suck?

[founderinglight]

Control eight of them and then we'll talk.

[Tentacle wiggle at you, Heart.]

[myocordial]

Oh, sorry, my mistake.

You suck times eight.

[founderinglight]

...At risk of taking the piss out of myself, isn't that why they're called suckers?

[myocordial]

[There's a slight pause. And then a snicker. And then Heart just keeps laughing, because what would be mildly amusing otherwise is, right now, absolutely hilarious.]

See, see? That just means I'm right!

Thank you for confirming that you suck!

[founderinglight]

I can't even be angry about it.

[Because he's high.]

But your insults still need work.

[myocordial]

...your face needs work.

[children please]

[founderinglight]

My face is magnificent and you just proved my point.

[myocordial]

Maybe from your... stupid, limited human perspective.

[oh heart honey no don't try to pull that card when you're this high]

[founderinglight]

I'm two thousand years old. And very pretty.

[myocordial]

Two thousand years old and human and dumb. You just took time off.

Being old doesn't mean you're right.

[sooooo there]

Ardyn's much prettier.

[founderinglight]

We're identical, so you're stupid too.

[myocordial]

Limited. Human. Perspective.

You just can't appreciate all the differences, you look alike and immediately think "ohhh, we're identical, there's no difference, it's just the saaaame!" when there are so many things that aren't the same? God, humans can be so stupid, no appreciation for nuance whatsoever.

[founderinglight]

Insofar as anyone can tell, my physical appearance is literally based off the one he had for the two thousand years prior to meeting you, because I was in the ring without a body for so long I forgot what those subtle differences were.

It's not my fault he went off and aged a year without me.

[myocordial]

It goes beyond the physical, that's the whole thing. You forgot all that, but you're still you and that will always shine through in some ways. Even if they're not obvious to you.

As someone who very literally copies someone else's appearance, I think I'd understand that.

[Wow, look at that... he actually had it together there? Maybe that means the effects are wearing off. Maybe Heart is finally back to norm--]

...And that's why Ardyn is prettier.

[Oh never mind, there it is, it was just a rambling lead up.

Carry on.]

[founderinglight]

...Wait, so there actually is someone who looks like that?

[Sorry he's distracted by the fact that someone just walks around looking like that.]

[myocordial]

Yes?

[He fails to understand why this is shocking information, because he still doesn't get that people think he's hot.]

I mean, I assume. He should still be. It's been around fifteen-- sixteen... [oh god numbers again, hang on...] Eigh...teen years... since then?

[Oh he is not nearly lucid enough to the math on this.]

[founderinglight]

Fffffffffffuck, I thought you were just made that way. That's not fair.

[myocordial]

No, I was not. We have to actually copy someone's appearance.

Technically, I could look like anyone I felt like.

[founderinglight]

[If Heart is paying attention, Izunia's tentacles, previously a reddish orange shading more red-pink as the high takes effect, are now a deep, vibrant crimson.]

That's not fair. I can't believe someone just looks like that.

[He buries his face in his hands.]

[myocordial]

[????????]

I don't... understand the problem.

That's how appearances work?

[founderinglight]

I like dangerous men and your face is unfair.

[myocordial]

[??????????????????]

I really don't get what's wrong with my face.

[...]

Dangerous?

[founderinglight]

There's absolutely nothing wrong with your face. It's flawless. That's why it's unfair.

[Beat.]

...What?