Who knows what’s right? The lines keep getting thinner

[makejapangreat]

Who: Shido Masayoshi and whatever unfortunate soul decides to approach him (Open)
What: Shido is working himself to the bone via self-inflicted punishment
When: Early May (like 5/1 ~ 5/12 or thereabouts)
Where: Various
Warnings: Lots of badbrain stuff going on with Shido rn, including self-deprecation, possible thoughts of suicide


[Library]
[Off in the corner sits a man, pouring over a manner of books. The more the days go by, the more that energy and health is sapped from him. The bags under his eyes have been persistent since day one of arriving here, but the noticeable changes are that he does seem to be losing some weight, and perhaps becoming a bit pallid... Yet a fire burns behind his eyes as he reads at the library like clockwork, occasionally extending a hand, fingers tensing, trying to press themselves down on some invisible object. Very occasionally, if one just happens to be around at the right time of day, they might hear a singular "pop" of air in his direction. It's also possible, at times, to find him completely slumped over on the table he's at, asleep, often grunting and twitching in his sleep— it's clearly not very restful...

On a brighter now, later on in the week you might see a henohenomoheji drawn on the back of Shido's head? He doesn't seem to be aware of this...]

[Library - 5/7 (Closed to Izunia)]
[There's more than just a pop today. Today? There's an outright crackle and snap of electricity.

Followed by an agonized yell and the clatter of a chair.

Shido lays on the floor, breathing heavily, one arm desperately clutching at the other that spasms from the surge of electricity that had torn through it. And then something peculiar happens.

Shido laughs. An unsteady sort of laugh, but nevertheless.

Maybe he electrocuted himself so badly he fried his brain...]

[Outside]
[If you get extra lucky, you might catch Shido outside. Particularly, the spot he chooses to go is north, to the top of the Skyclimb Cliffs, where he looks out to the ocean. It seems, well... somewhat of a precarious place for someone to be, really. He seems to be awfully close to the edge at times, no sign of fear or wariness in his body. You might catch him looking down, as if considering something, but for the most part? His gaze remains on the endless blue.

And then, after about thirty minutes of this, he'll quietly turn and head back.]

Comments

[superstylishsquid]

They do call me the Lightning Devil...among other things. Electricity is kind of my signature thing.

It's not too surprising you're having a rough time of it, though. Electricity likes to do what it wants. And a lot of the time, that's to jump into the nearest conductive object...like a human body.

[makejapangreat]

[A scoff.] At least I got it to work. Not bad for a mundane human.

[got it to work....... one time...... at least]

[superstylishsquid]

Especially if this is your first time with magic. But just a tip: maybe you should invest in rubber gloves until you get the hang of controlling it. Last I checked, ordinary mortals took some serious damage from any kind of respectable voltage.

[makejapangreat]

... I suppose that I should.

[he doesn't seem terribly concerned about self-preservation........]

[superstylishsquid]

[Well, that's...concerning. He sets the turtle shell down on the table and walks over to sit next to Shido. Don't mind the draft from his wings, he's doing his best to tuck them against his back.]

You alright?

[makejapangreat]

[He glances at Alastor, then brings a hand and rubs it down his face.]

I'm just tired.

[But the kind of tired that isn't so simple as just a lack of sleep or from exhaustion. It's the kind of tired that permeates into his soul, and it shows through his voice.]

[superstylishsquid]

Is this about that whole debacle earlier this month?

[makejapangreat]

That's part of it, at least.

[He brings his hand up again, trying to summon the electricity again... Shido, what did Alastor just say about rubber gloves???]

[superstylishsquid]

[...Yeah no. He snaps his fingers, and all the ambient electricity in the room flows into his hand, leaving it shimmering with blue and white sparks for a moment.]

Right, lemme take a guess based on what I saw: you were a villain back home, and a really nasty one at that. Then a bunch of kids kick started your conscience somehow and you feel terrible about it, but you're too stuck dwelling on what you've done wrong to move forward. So, instead, you just sit here, half-killing yourself trying to learn magic that might fry your brain if you make an exhausted mistake because if you die, it might as well be trying to learn something useful.

How close am I?

[makejapangreat]

[hey what the hell, what are you showing off again for??? —wait, did he just take away all the electricity? the look shido is giving alastor now is suspiciously close to a pout.

It quickly melts away, though, as he gives a summary of what the devil had deduced. He lets out a breath at the end of it.]

... I don't intend to kill myself. I'm purely a novice at this sort of thing, anyway, so I doubt I could harness enough energy to do any serious damage.

[superstylishsquid]

Just give yourself nerve damage. And from your lack of answer to the rest of it, it sounds like I hit the nail on the head.

[His tail swishes back and forth behind him, and he sighs.]

Maybe I should tell you a story from my own world.

[makejapangreat]

[He eyes Alastor for a moment before he finally gives a head bow and a "go on" gesture.]

[superstylishsquid]

This goes back two thousand years, when anyone could travel between Hell and Earth if they knew where to go and how to open the gate. An incredibly powerful and heartless demon named Mundus had taken over the underworld, and declared war on humanity. Back in the day, humans had their witches and sorcerers, but they were no match for inherently magical beings from the kind of world that pushes its inhabitants to be strong just to survive. It seemed inevitable that humanity would be wiped out.

Leading some of the most ferocious and effective charges was Sparda, Mundus' most trusted general...and his most powerful. He was ruthless, loyal, and unstoppable...until one day, for some reason, he developed a sense of empathy toward humankind. Nobody's sure exactly what motivated him to change, but he turned against Mundus and beat back the same army he used to lead. He sealed Mundus away and separated the human and demon worlds, so that others with the same ideas as Mundus couldn't keep terrorizing humans.

Back when he was a demon general, Sparda was the most feared villain known to mankind...but now, his legacy is one of justice and compassion, of realizing what he was fighting for was wrong, and turning around to protect the same people he used to threaten. These days, he's one of the greatest heroes in recorded history.

[makejapangreat]

[Shido is quietly attentive during the story, brow furrowed as he listens. Slowly, his eyebrows raise during the middle of it, and he actually... seems to genuinely perk up a bit. He sits up a little straighter, some alertness and spark coming back to him.]

... that's... quite remarkable.

[He casts his gaze back to his books, suddenly feeling a twist of guilt, and it might reflect in his eyes. This self-punishment is... it's selfish, isn't it...?]

[superstylishsquid]

It's really something else, that's for sure. I never would've expected a demon to become so widely admired by humans, but he did it.

[There's a definite note of respect in his voice, and...maybe a hint of envy.]

So, seeing things a bit differently after hearing all that?

[makejapangreat]

[A sigh, and his hand comes up to scrub at his face.]

I already know this sort of thing doesn't help anyone. And the truth was that it wasn't meant to. I can't...

I can't help but feel like I've gotten off far too easy.

[superstylishsquid]

Well...I can't help you with that. But, if it were me? I'd think the way to make up for it is to find ways to atone, do good to counter the evil from your past. Consider it an extreme form of community service.

And in order to do that, you need to be in good shape. When was the last time you slept in a bed, or ate a full meal?

[makejapangreat]

[A soft, if reluctant, noise of agreement.]

... awhile ago.

[superstylishsquid]

...Are you going to put the book down and follow me to the kitchen, or am I going to have to pick you up and carry you there?

[makejapangreat]

A-ah... no, that won't be necessary.

[PLS DON'T HE'S GETTING UP NOW...]

[superstylishsquid]

[He's getting up too and taking a glance over at the shell.]

How do you feel about turtle soup?

[makejapangreat]

... it's not my favorite, as far as meat goes, but I won't say no to it.

[superstylishsquid]

Well, turtle's not all we have. I'm not picky, so go ahead and lemme know what your preference is and I can whip something up.

[makejapangreat]

... are you partial to shrimp? There's some in the freezer.