founderinglight: (fanart erryday)
Izunia Lucis Caelum ([personal profile] founderinglight) wrote in [community profile] phantasmalrift 2018-06-09 02:38 am (UTC)

cw suicidal ideation

...I believed 'Ardyn' already dead. I...

[No amount of fishy euphoria can really help him now. He's very obviously distressed, and it all just kind of tumbles out.]

The first time was an accident. Not the executions. Just a terrible, terrible fucking accident and he was gone and I couldn't stand it. Couldn't deal with a world without him in it, couldn't deal with seeing his face on what I thought was a monster to remind me of it constantly.

...Couldn't end myself, not when the people he loved so much needed someone and I was the only option left.

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